Now children are openly being encouraged to flout the laws of morality and the land. Guardian-reading do-gooders have been setting fire to libraries outside nursery schools.

Terror expert Norris McWhirter, speaking posthumously has analysed the phenomenon in a new book which we certainly aren’t plugging although it is available from our bookshop for just £7.99; a fantastic 1.7% discount.

In "Setting fire to libraries: The True Face Of Evil", Norris McWhirter, speaking posthumously says, "I can no longer sit back and allow Communist infiltration, Communist indoctrination, Communist subversion and the international Communist conspiracy to sap and impurify all of our precious bodily fluids.".

A decent "Big Society" that cared about children would bring back hanging for Guardian-reading do-gooders. After the hanging the still twitching bodies would be deported to somewhere tropical and foreign.